Read 2 Samuel 14, Daniel 4, and Mark 14.
This devotional is about 2 Samuel 14.
Back in 2 Samuel 12:10-11, Nathan told David that his family life would be characterized by violence because of David’s sins against Uriah the Hittite. We have been reading the fulfillments of this prophecy as we read about Amnon’s rape of Tamar and Absolom’s revenge against Amnon in 2 Samuel 13.
Amnon’s sin against Tamar was clearly forbidden in the Old Testament. Raping a woman was punishable by death (Deut 22:25); incest was punishable by being “cut off from the community” (cf. Lev 18:9, 29). Being “cut off from the community” might be a way of saying banished from Israel; it might also be a way of saying, “put to death.” Scholars are not certain. But when Amnon raped Tamar, he deserved a severe punishment, having committed both rape and incest. As we saw when we read 2 Samuel 13 yesterday, David was passive and did not punish Amnon in any way.
When Absolom murdered Amnon, again, in 2 Samuel 13, he was seeing retributive justice for his sister. But, as king, it was David’s job to administer justice. His refusal to do anything in 2 Samuel 13 is appalling. He did not get justice for his daughter Tamar by punishing Amnon. Then, he did not punish Absolom for taking justice into his own hands. At the end of 2 Samuel 13, Absolom ran away from accountability and David allowed him to stay free and unaccountable for three years, according to 2 Samuel 13:38. Verse 39 of 2 Samuel 13 closes that chapter with these words, “And King David longed to go to Absalom, for he was consoled concerning Amnon’s death.”
Here in 2 Samuel 14, Joab, David’s chief army officer, wanted to effect some kind of reconciliation between David and Absolom. His motives were personal and selfish. Joab “knew that the king’s heart longed for Absolom” (v. 1), so he knew David would be even more favorable toward him if he could bring Absolom and David together (v. 22).
So, Joab put together a plan. He created a little play for David by finding an actor to tell David a story. The purpose was to get David to issue a pardon to her son (vv. 2-11), but then apply the lesson to David’s relationship with Absolom (vv. 12-20).
The drama worked and David offered a measure of restoration to Absolom, allowing him to live in Jerusalem (vv. 21-23), but not enter David’s presence (v. 24). After two years of this awkward situation, Absolom forced the issue and got Joab to complete the process of his restoration by getting an audience with his father, the king, David (vv. 28-33).
This “restoration” between Absolom and David was shallow at best. David completely refused to exercise his responsibility as king by executing justice against his son Absolom. Absolom, meanwhile, was unrepentant for what he did. By asking David to receive him without repentance, Absolom was daring David to bring him to justice (v. 32). When David refused to lead in his role as a father and refused to do justice in his role as a king, he was papering over a problem that would get worse, not to mention sinning against God.
But how often do we let things go unresolved with others? How often do we see concerning actions by our kids, but ignore them? If you have any kind of leadership role at work, do you confront problems quickly, clearly, and decisively, or do you try to avoid dealing with them at all?
As Christians, we believe in grace and forgiveness. But real forgiveness can only happen with true repentance and, often, people don’t repent until they are confronted with their sins–like Nathan did to David back in 2 Samuel 12.
Don’t ignore sins or problems in an area where you bear responsibility. Confront those sins and problems. Yes, with an attitude that seeks repentance and restoration, but with a willingness to do what is right regardless of how the other person responds to your confrontation. There can be no forgiveness without repentance. There can be no reconciliation without a direct conversation about the problem. Don’t hope for problems to go away. Talk to people who have done wrong or repent if you’ve done wrong and seek a genuine level of restoration.
This is what God the father has done for us. He has provided a pathway for reconciliation with him through the death and resurrection of Christ. But he confronts our sins and calls us to repent of them, offering us the gift of mercy and grace because of what Christ did for us.
Handle your problems the same way.