Read Ephesians 5.
I mentioned yesterday that God’s love is a key theme in Ephesians and that, in Christ, we live worthy of the calling by acting in love towards one another.
The opening verses of today’s chapter said it directly, “Follow God’s example, therefore, as dearly loved children and walk in the way of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us….” The rest of the chapter–and much of the next one–specify what it means to “walk in the way of love.”
There are all kinds of highly applicable commands in this passage but let’s focus on this one: “Nor should there be obscenity, foolish talk or coarse joking, which are out of place, but rather thanksgiving.” An article from a few years ago in the Guardian, a newspaper from the United Kingdom, reported dramatic increases in swear words that were used in books.
The article said that researchers searched almost 1 million books written in American English and published between 1950 and 2008. During that time period, one swear word had increased in usage 678 times between 1950 and the mid-2000s.
Another word was used 168 times more often over that time period. This is no surprise to any of us who have been alive for the last half or more of the past six decades. Our society has grown more and more comfortable using words that speak crudely of sex or of bodily functions.
Many of these words are used to express a person’s anger. It seems to me that our society has more anger to express than ever before, too, which correlates with the increase in cursing.
One of the ways God calls us to “live a life of love” is to remove obscene, crude talk from our conversation. Paul said in verse 4 that these words are “out of place.”
What makes them out of place?
The fact that we belong to God, for one, who calls us to be holy like he is (see 3b). Furthermore, knowing Christ changes our outlook on the world and gives us the tools to be angry without sinning.
But the most immediate antidote for cursing is given to us in verse 4 as well when Paul says, “…but rather thanksgiving.” You can’t be angry and thankful at the same time. One way to deal with anger biblically, then, is to pivot your thinking from the things that make you mad and want to curse to something you can give thanks for in that situation. Turn your curses, then, into opportunities to bless the Lord for the good things He has done in your life. This will help you to live a life of love, just as Christ himself did.